Devotion

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Re: Devotion

Postby NeoVid » Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:10 am

She weighs a bit less than two pounds, Gabby's about 210, so I went with the hundred times. The stat calculator is a big part of why I decided to go with the sizes I did, any of my attempts to apply logical thought to a society with these differences of scale crashed and burned with legitimate giants weighing hundreds of tons.

Though if that's the biggest actual mistake I made, I'm doing much better than I expected. Just thought, was my whole error just saying "mass" instead of "weight?"

As for my inspirations, I've had a lot of spare time to read recently, and the biggest one was something I found by Aussieluvtail on FA. VDO from FA had a short story that also got me thinking, enough to start getting solid ideas for scenes. It was actually Arilin's stuff that got me considering a setting like this in the first place, though Arilin's works tend to be crueler than my tastes run. Still well-written (and pretty hot), but I ended up deciding to write this entirely to suit my own preferences. Actually showing the sex seemed unnecessary.

Now, there are many, many, times I've really liked gratuitous sex scenes, but this story wasn't the place for it. Since this was an unexpected event for both of them, good as it turned out, it was also awkward, and not just because of the size issue.

Thanks for the commentary. I'll likely say more when I post the conclusion in a day or two.

Edited slightly to make it more coherent than my original, 2 AM reply.
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Re: Devotion

Postby kool kitty89 » Thu Dec 06, 2012 4:08 am

NeoVid wrote:She weighs a bit less than two pounds, Gabby's about 210, so I went with the hundred times. The stat calculator is a big part of why I decided to go with the sizes I did, any of my attempts to apply logical thought to a society with these differences of scale crashed and burned with legitimate giants weighing hundreds of tons.

Bringing real-world physics into these things always screws things up . . . unless you either leave it vague enough to support suspension of disbelief, or actually go into greater details in (somewhat) justifying/explaining how this might be possible. (sci-fi style . . . or fantasy style if you're doing magic and stuff -though the latter is more like tossing "real world" out the window anyway)

However, in your example, with "normal" height and "micro" sizes (so to speak), you've still got a big problem, and my previous size/mass ratio explanation still stands.
There's no (realistic) physical way Paula could weigh close to 2 pounds at only ~6" tall. Realistically (at roughly 1/12th scale, assuming rouggly 150~170 lbs for 6' tall equivalent -depending on build) she should be under 2 ounces, not 2 pounds.

She'd need to be about 2x as dense as lead to weigh nearly 2 pounds at 6" tall. Specifically, she'd need to be roughly 20x as dense as a normal living animal (which is very near that of water). Incidentally, this happens to be just about as dense as pure gold :p (or tungsten -fun fact: Tungsten is almost the exact same density as Gold).

Though if that's the biggest actual mistake I made, I'm doing much better than I expected. Just thought, was my whole error just saying "mass" instead of "weight?"

Don't get hung up on mass vs weight, unless you're going to be going into space or different planets, the two are effectively interchangeable. Though a note on this general suject, some other terms, particularly "heavy" or "light" might be used to denote density rather than sheer mass/weight, but you didn't go into any of that anyway.

As for my inspirations, I've had a lot of spare time to read recently, and the biggest one was something I found by Aussieluvtail on FA. VDO from FA had a short story that also got me thinking, enough to start getting solid ideas for scenes. It was actually Arilin's stuff that got me considering a setting like this in the first place, though Arilin's works tend to be crueler than my tastes run. Still well-written (and pretty hot), but I ended up deciding to write this entirely to suit my own preferences. Actually showing the sex seemed unnecessary.

How familiar are you with the other authors on this site, and the stuff that's been submitted over the years?

I can think of quite a few other romantic stories (or series even) in this (general) vein that are on the warmer side (or cute/funny), while being very well written. Several of of DTF's stories comes to mind, and in a pretty broad variety of action/adventure/fantasy/sci-fi/romantic contexts. (the unofficially named "Rick and Sylvia" series -starting with "writers, pen pals, and blind dates," and his "From the country to the city" come to mind in particular)

DrKarl's Welcome Visitor story also comes to mind.
viewtopic.php?f=2&t=15263
Edit: OK, wow, this is that same story from Aussieluvtail (Mriya on his old FA account) . . . I posted these before I checked out your links, funny that this one came to mind. ;) (I really need to check out his more recent stuff)

And Macrokat's own Mac and Tia Comic/short story series is definitely up there (wow, I hadn't realized that started back in 2008).
forums.macrophile.com/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=14117
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=14152
viewtopic.php?f=2&t=14781
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=14792
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=15090
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Re: Devotion

Postby NeoVid » Thu Dec 06, 2012 4:31 am

Ah, I see... it never crossed my mind that a person that size would weigh that much less than a real-world critter of about the same size. I just looked up a bit of info on plain old rats and went from there.

And I used to have the time to read just about everything posted here. That was years ago, sadly, and I only got a good amount of free time again very recently, which is also why I have the chance to write. I read a ton of DTF's work back in the day, and I'll take a look at the others you linked now that I know about them. Turned out DrKarl is Aussieluvtail's username here... thought that sounded familiar.

Wow, time to do things for fun, it's a weird feeling. I'm more used to not being able to finish all the things I'm required to do.
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Re: Devotion

Postby kool kitty89 » Thu Dec 06, 2012 11:12 pm

NeoVid wrote:Ah, I see... it never crossed my mind that a person that size would weigh that much less than a real-world critter of about the same size. I just looked up a bit of info on plain old rats and went from there.

The proportions of actual rats are quite a bit different (ie much bulkier), and I'm assuming your characters have relatively human-like proportions. (some anthro characters are depicted closer to "feral" proportions, so that would be a factor too)

And I used to have the time to read just about everything posted here. That was years ago, sadly, and I only got a good amount of free time again very recently, which is also why I have the chance to write. I read a ton of DTF's work back in the day, and I'll take a look at the others you linked now that I know about them. Turned out DrKarl is Aussieluvtail's username here... thought that sounded familiar.

Things have slowed down a bit on the forums the last couple years, so there's not that much to dig through or keep up with. (look at the adult story forum, there's still threads from over a year ago on the front page :p -the non-adult section has been a lot more active though)
Good or bad, the quality of the stuff that does show up is still very good for the most part, which is the main reason I've kept up with this community. (ie, I don't have to waste a bunch of time wading though crap -so to speak)

You should definitely check out RaddaRaem's stuff too, he's got some recently finished (and active series) on the front pages, and his first story posted here was a good one too: viewtopic.php?f=2&t=15431 ( viewtopic.php?f=9&t=14625 first posted -and discussed- here, but later compiled and reposted in the non-adult section; it really wasn't adult in nature) There's a lot of humor in his stories.
It's probably easier to look up his stuff on FA though, at least for the completed stuff, and I think one or two things that weren't posted on the forums at all. (DTF has done that too with a couple recent works)

and there's Mr Nelg's stuff, particularly his most recent one: viewtopic.php?f=2&t=17554 which is still on the front page. (never looked him up on FA, but he mentioned being more active on bigfurs iirc -I never really got into that community either)

Actually, you might as well just browse the front pages on the forums, as there's a good concentration of that there right now.


Edit, I keep forgetting to comment on one other aspect of the story:
The show-biz/entertainment industry setting is a really interesting plot element in your story, and reminded me of some of DTF's and Kusanagi's recent works too. (The Show, Acting!! . . . and The City's a Stage, but that's been an ongoing saga for a long time)
There's one or two others that I'm remembering too, but I can't put my finger on the titles. (I think it was DTF's, but I'm not sure)
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Re: Devotion

Postby NeoVid » Sat Dec 08, 2012 1:37 am

Hmm, true enough... I think I'll just say the little people weigh about a pound and have it be one of the setting's Designated Logic Holes. Much as I like overthinking things, there's a time when stops doing any good.

Anyway, short conclusion, which I probably should have posted before, but I got distracted outlining the followup story.



<><><><>

As she slowly woke, disjointed half-thoughts ran through Paula's mind. I'm aching all over, so why do I feel so good? I'm painfully hungry, gotta get up... Hmm, smells like there's something already warmed up... How'd that... Wait, this doesn't feel anything like my bed, gah whereamI Her eyes snapped open, and took in the sight of a wall of fur in front of her face. Shaggy, reddish fur that she knew, intimately...
"Morning, beautiful."
The affectionate voice from above brought it all back. She realized she was lying on a pillow sitting in Gabby's lap, and she had been snuggling up against his belly in her sleep. Rolling over on her back, she mumbled, "So that really did happen..."
"By 'that,' I hope you're referring to the multiples I gave you last night. I'd really feel bad for you if you forgot."
"...Yes, that's the real Gabby Davies, all right."
"I'm one of a kind. And the world is grateful for that." Gabby petted her softly as she stretched and sat up. "I've been up for a while. Also, I've been awake longer than you." He paused while waiting for the joke to sink in. After she groaned and facepalmed, he went on, "Anyway, since you were out like a light, I took some time to make breakfast for us... as in, I made something for myself, and I won't notice the difference no matter how much you want."
"Oh, thank god. It feels like my stomach is going to declare war if I put it off any longer."
That got a huge smile. "An intense workout will do that. See, exercise really is good for you!"
"Can't talk, starving. Whatever you have, I want some."
"Well, I've kept some sausage warm for you-"
"Gabby..." she said in a warning tone.
He raised an eyebrow. "That's what I fried up. If you thought I was making a sex joke, that's your own dirty mind."
Paula almost said something in reply, paused, then muttered, "I walked right into that one."
"And there you go, handing me straight lines again." He took the plate he had left on the nightstand and ferried it over to the bed, placing it next to Paula. "Sorry if this isn't what you prefer, but the choices were only a little less pathetic than at most bachelors' homes."
"You've told me you know something about cooking, haven't you?"
"Yeah, I've got a wide variety of skills that I thought might help me get laid. But if I started shopping intelligently, it'd really be time to give up my Guy License. Now, enjoy. You've got those 'responsibilities' I've heard rumors about, and I know you don't want me distracting you."
She smiled hugely and gave him a meaningful look. "Not until later, at least. After this, I need a fast shower, then I'll need to get dressed and go."
"A shower? I'll help!"
"I knew you'd offer. Just remember, I'm pressed for time, don't get any ideas." Before Gabby could reply, she went on, "Wait, I misspoke. What I should have said was, 'Get all the ideas you want, but they have to wait until I'm off work.'"
"No getting off until you get off? I can cope." Unexpectedly, Gabby picked her up and hugged her softly against his cheek. "I'll be waiting. And spending most of the day in the unending glee of a guy getting to live his dreams, thanks to you." Paula relaxed against him and caressed that expressive face as she felt it break out in a huge grin. Most people would think it was crazy to want to be this close to a giant, and they may even be right, but even so, just being in her lover's embrace felt like safety and home.


END


"One last thing... 'eHarmony client!'"
"Oh god, don't... Ow, I think I just strained something laughing so hard..."


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Re: Devotion

Postby macrokat » Sat Dec 08, 2012 3:30 am

XD I was just gonna comment but then a bot posted so I removed that, then got distracted by work stuff... so my train of thought has derailed... but I'm still gonna try and form a coherent comment.


Overall, great story. Always love a happy ending, and the two seem really good together, so that's even better.

I have to agree with the other comments so far... the love scene... or more accurately the allusion to and references of... were very effective. You did a great job building it up. As far as actually writing it, versus how it is now... I think how it is is best. Because of the imagination. You've done such a good job with the characters and their interactions, trying to imagine and visualize what happened would indeed be more powerful than actually reading it. But that's one of the reason written stories are always more powerful than most media anyway. Because you have to use your imagination throughout.


And hooray, my first story here was mentioned in a previous comment, woot! XD

I feel the same way as you, for all the stompy, rampagy, violent macro stuff, there isn't much romantic stuff. So those are definitely my favorite types of subject for macro stuff. The gentle/fun interactions, rather than the dangerous ones. Speaking of which, their little discussion about the darker macro fetishes and acts, while brief, was nice to see. I've often thought the same things myself as what was mentioned in the story. So that little bit, along with his general concern for her well being was nice, it added some reality to the situation without bringing it down and showed some extra depth in that they do recognize there will be obstacles to overcome.


I definitely think giant women have it easier than giant guys when it comes to relationships... at least when it comes to playing around they do...

But these two seem pretty happy, so hopefully everything works out for them even after the happy ending.


Nice work definitely a good enjoyable read full of clever jokes. :D
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Re: Devotion

Postby NeoVid » Fri Jan 25, 2013 12:35 am

Just wanted to mention that I finally got this story posted on FA. It's pretty damn hard for writing to get noticed on FA unless the writer is already well-known, so I figured it was a good idea to link here. I just hope it doesn't make me seem desperate.

Despite the fact that I am.
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Re: Devotion

Postby TendoTwo » Sat Feb 02, 2013 3:36 am

First and foremost, what caught my attention most in these chapters was what Gabby considered giant and normal.

In most micro/macro settings either both groups consider themselves the normals and the other micros/macros, or they consider anything in the 5-6 foot range normal and those whose height is measured in inches "micros" while those whose height is measured in dozens or hundreds of feet "macros".

So at first I was confused when it was mentioned that the "normal" buzzer was going off yet it was clear Paula was ringing it, until Gabby's thoughts on being six feet tall was akin to being a giant. If his kind were rare or he grew up in a rodent's neighborhood that would be a common viewpoint to have, but his neighborhood and apartment being converted for rats and his dating people his own size before makes it a rather odd, and yet fascinatingly more unique viewpoint to have.

Paula's rage, especially when not caring what Gabby did to Mick, was actually quite a shock. I mean, fully understandable and all, it was just a surprising shift in personality from before. That and her forwardness with Gabby later, it made her character a lot more interesting and less one-dimensional actually. You rarely see someone like Paula in these kinds of stories be the more aggressive one.

Considering not too much had been revealed about the world yet, I was a bit worried just how far Gabby would go to get back at Mick, but to see him actually even feel guilty about bullying him, much less not kill him as I was worried he would, was also surprising to see, rare to see setting where a "giant" is that compassionate. His panic afterwards was another defining character moment, many of even the most kindhearted giants would have been smug about such a thing, not freaking out at the panic of the realization. One thing I wondered about though, if Gabby went that far to hide his identity... isn't it kinda fruitless when hes the only one his size living in the entire city?

Oh, and finally. Gabby's dialog throughout this entire thing was pure gold. I know he is supposed to be a comedian, but his dialog just felt so natural without being forced to add puns and jokes just to enforce the fact that he works in comedy. I don't think I have ever read of a character whose comedic dialog flowed that naturally before.
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Re: Devotion

Postby NeoVid » Sat Feb 02, 2013 6:15 am

Hey, thanks for the detailed comments! I couldn't find many chances to fit in solid background information in this story without forcing it. The next in this series will spell out a lot more. But I like getting commentary (and excuses to ramble), so I'm glad to answer questions directly. I surprised myself with the amount of behind-the-scenes info I came up with for this setting.

One point is explained by a simple fact: The majority determines what's normal. People of what we would consider average size aren't at all rare or unusual, but they're outnumbered at least 8 to 1 by littles, due to the obvious, that smaller people need a tiny fraction of the space and resources. Also, that bit about the Plague hinted at something critical in the setting's history, but I'll leave that until it comes up in character in my next story.

And yes, her reaction, as I was writing it, was making me think, "Damnnnn... that's a dark side I wasn't expecting." Her reaction's not at all hard to believe if you've ever met a victim of that, but I surprised myself when I got to that scene and realized what she was really going to be thinking at the time. As for her taking the initiative, well... I like role reversal. In character, the reason would be that Gabby would never make a move himself, since despite his professional image as a sleazebag, he's repulsed by the idea of forcing yourself on the ladies, and he's twelve times her height, it would have always felt like he was pressuring her. So neither of them considered romance until they were both forced out of their pattern... Gabby, being huge, has been told his whole life that he'd better not abuse his sole advantage over most people. Paula, having a career dealing with the worst of what people have to offer, doesn't think most folks are worth special consideration, except when she finds someone who proves otherwise... which, to their mutual surprise, was the guy down the hall who's 200 times her mass.

As for Gabby's compassion, that's nothing too far out of the ordinary for this setting. Gabby might have been raised better than some people, but there's very little history of "dehumanizing" people in this world due to their size. World building is fun, and part of what made this setting interesting to me was putting logical thought into what kind of society would have developed in a world like this. Honestly, I think that a lot of the reason for how the smaller people get treated in macro/micro settings is left over from most macrophiles finding their interest due to monster movies... And Gabby's nowhere near the only person his size in the city, he's just one of the very few living in the district restricted to smaller people. There's separation of sizes for obvious safety/infrastructure/legal reasons (another thing I'll get into in my next story) but it's back to giant territory just a few blocks away. The Smalltown district doesn't need to expand often, and when it does, repurposing existing giant-sized structures is the simplest thing to do. Part of why Gabby's landlord wanted to throw him out is because rooms his size could be remodeled into space for dozens of smaller (paying) residents.

And thanks! Believe it or not, Gabby talks a lot like I do in RL, just with less restraint and more polish... he does this for a living, after all. A huge part of what makes him fun and easy to write is just the chance to think, "OK, what would my next line be if I didn't care about getting punched in the face?"
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Re: Devotion

Postby TendoTwo » Mon Feb 04, 2013 1:32 am

NeoVid wrote:One point is explained by a simple fact: The majority determines what's normal. People of what we would consider average size aren't at all rare or unusual, but they're outnumbered at least 8 to 1 by littles, due to the obvious, that smaller people need a tiny fraction of the space and resources. Also, that bit about the Plague hinted at something critical in the setting's history, but I'll leave that until it comes up in character in my next story.


Oh wow, that's actually not something I had ever considered, as well as an interesting take on it. (Perhaps because the only stories I had seen there the "micros" were in the majority, they were also considered pests or prey, not equals like in here).

A question about the outnumbered thing though, is that simply because there is a lot more room for them to live in compared to people who are i the 5-6 foot range so families have an easier time having space to live?

NeoVid wrote:As for Gabby's compassion, that's nothing too far out of the ordinary for this setting. Gabby might have been raised better than some people, but there's very little history of "dehumanizing" people in this world due to their size. World building is fun, and part of what made this setting interesting to me was putting logical thought into what kind of society would have developed in a world like this. Honestly, I think that a lot of the reason for how the smaller people get treated in macro/micro settings is left over from most macrophiles finding their interest due to monster movies... And Gabby's nowhere near the only person his size in the city, he's just one of the very few living in the district restricted to smaller people. There's separation of sizes for obvious safety/infrastructure/legal reasons (another thing I'll get into in my next story) but it's back to giant territory just a few blocks away.


Ah, my main reason I was worried what Gabby might do was because at that point the story was still young and it wasn't clear how everyone viewed each other in the world, other than Gabby's comment about "humans and canids being unable to keep their hands off each other". It became more obvious that the different races got along after Gabby's feelings on the matter later.

And yeah, I think most people seem to like the power aspect of macro/micro which is why the majority of stories are more Godzilla-like than, well, than worlds like this. Even in stories where the main characters are friendly, half the time they are the exception to how others in that world treat each other. So I was pretty surprised when I realized how friendly all the races regardless of size acted towards each other. Honestly, I always found reading about how races of different sizes do (or do not) co-exist being more interesting than the power aspect of it.

The different sized residents living in different cities out of safety rather than prejudice is just a no-brainer after that fact.
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